What My Extroverted Daughter Has Taught Me About Life

Not only did this thrust me into a lot of new situations (conversing with random strangers while they cooed over my baby), but it caused me to question some of my own beliefs about human connection and my ability to communicate with others. Was it really as difficult as I imagined? I will always have that need for space and time to myself, but could I lose some of the social awkwardness I carried around with me? Possibly so. Here's what I've learned in my two years (so far) of loving this bonkers little extrovert:

I’ve always found that initial moment of meeting someone to be particularly awkward. I notice my mind worrying about whether that person wants to talk to me, about what I can say and whether it’s interesting. She has no such qualms. She’ll wander over, offering her hand to hold and a smile. It's as simple as that. This is almost universally met with reciprocated smiles and encouragement, however fleeting. It's made me realize that what you’re saying doesn’t matter so much as the intention with which you say it. Most of us simply want to connect with genuine and positive people.

She doesn’t write someone off for having a bad day and is endlessly optimistic about the chances of connecting positively. I’ve noticed in my own life how much easier it is if we give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Meeting their irritation with kindness and generosity is an act of compassion that creates gratitude and warmth in return.

My daughter has a knack for finding the most elderly or frail people or those sitting alone and engaging with them, which inevitably means I am drawn into conversation. If I had been on my own, I would never have gone up to people like this, worrying (selfishly) that I might get drawn into a conversation I couldn’t leave (an introvert’s nightmare). Seeing the delight on people’s faces as she holds out a chubby hand to hold or does a silly dance for them makes me realize that I’ve been wrong all these years. The conversation is rarely awkward, and I’m always able to leave, but it brings so much happiness to everyone involved that it's always worthwhile.

As much as I love human contact, I’m never sure whether other people do, so I tend to hang back and keep my distance. My little extrovert has no such fear. She’ll offer a hand to hold or a hug freely, spreading joy and happiness wherever she goes. I often find myself marveling at how easy she makes this seem. It’s helped me realize that my worries are unfounded and that maybe the awkward dance of non-hugging is worse than just giving it a go. No one has jumped away in horror yet, anyway.

Want more insights on how to level up your life? Check out your love horoscope, then find out why holding on to past relationships is the worst thing you can do for yourself.