Why Thinking About Your Ex Can Actually Be Beneficial, According To Research

Whether you went through a nasty breakup or parted on good terms, you might assume that nostalgically thinking of your past relationships wouldn't be a good thing, especially if you're in a new relationship.

Can thinking about your ex ever have a positive effect? That's what researchers from the University of Kansas wanted to find out. To test their query, they rounded up participants and had them reflect on nostalgic memories of their exes across three different studies.

And based on their results, a little nostalgia for your ex can actually improve your current relationship. That's right—in all three studies, the researchers found that thinking about nostalgic memories of ex-partners "increased the perception of current relationship quality," compared to the control group.

Further, the study authors note, thinking of relationships past can even enhance your motivation to keep your current romantic relationship alive and well.

Based on this research, thinking about your ex here and there when you're in a relationship isn't necessarily a bad thing. However, if you're consumed by thoughts of your ex, then you might be dealing with a different beast entirely.

Whether you're dreaming about them, stalking their social media, or going back and forth about whether to text them, it's important to identify the fine line between innocent (and even beneficial) nostalgia, versus being hung up about them—especially if you're in a new relationship now.

"I have worked with people who kid themselves into thinking they are over an ex when they really aren't," psychologist and relationship expert Margaret Paul, Ph.D., previously told mbg. "Many people don't want to do the inner work to really be over an ex" and instead just pretend to have moved on.