Can A Flirty DM Really Harm Your Relationship? This Study Has Answers

This research was composed of two separate studies. Both studies involved having participants in romantic relationships talk to an attractive person online (who was actually a member of the research team).

For half of the participants, the attractive person directly flirted with them, and for the other half, the conversation was neutral to serve as a control group.

After chatting with the attractive stranger, one study had participants then report on how attracted they were to their current partner, and further, complete a task that revealed unconscious perceptions of that partner.

For the second study, after chatting with the attractive stranger, participants were instructed to write down the first sexual fantasy they could think of.

Based on the findings of the two studies, it seems that flirtatious interactions with internet strangers are far from harmless to our romantic relationships.

In fact, in the first study, those who were flirted with had worse perceptions of their current partner (consciously and unconsciously) than the control group.

In the second study, those who were flirted with were more likely to desire and have sexual fantasies related to an alternative partner than their current partner, compared to the control.

Altogether, these findings point to a risky apparent truth with online flirting: Even if you're not reciprocating or acting on the flirtations, being the recipient of someone's flirting online may still unconsciously lead you to view your partner in a less positive light and to desire alternative options more.

Conversations about social media and relationships tend to revolve around what does or doesn't count as micro-cheating. But this study suggests that even one-directional online flirting can loosen loyalties.

While you can't really stop anyone from flirting with you initially, nor is it out of the ordinary to find other people attractive even when you're in a committed relationship, it's important to be aware of how these interactions may affect your feelings for your current partner.