The Qualities Of A Good Medium Reading (From Someone Who's Had 50+ Of Them)

To give you insights into what an excellent reading looks like and what you should stay away from, here are a few highlights from my best and lowlights from my worst:

Information from good mediums is specific. The very first medium I went to was one of the best (and as with all my readings I took precautions to hide my identity, so, no, she didn't Google me!). She stated that my cat who had just died, the very sweet one, was with my dad. She got that my grandmother had lost a young child. She did not understand why my dad kept showing her the color green. That was his favorite color and he even had a small office room in our apartment that was all green. 

The worst readings I've ever had were very general. One of the worst, once I told her who had died, after it was clear she could not get that, proceeded to give me messages from my dad. That would have been fine had the messages not been that I need to learn to trust and that I have work to do around letting go of old issues or anxieties, as well as other general messages that could apply to anyone. 

In my experience, the information pours out of them, and the majority of it is highly accurate. (Note that no medium is ever 100% accurate despite what highly edited TV shows might make you think!) Good mediums want your loved ones to tell them the information, not to get the information from you. 

Yes, a good medium may be stumped, and ask you for some information but won't do that for the majority of the reading. 

The best mediums deliver information with clarity. One of the best I've visited mentioned I'd just taken a trip and had flown JetBlue. One stated that my dad was with Bobby (the name of my uncle who also passed). During another great reading that I got with a group, the medium mentioned the name of my grandmother and then randomly, the name of her son's (my uncle's) boat—although he did not associate it with a boat.

In one of the worst medium readings of my life, the information provided was foggy and had no specific meaning. For example, the medium opened with a message she claimed was specifically for me, stating that "As you release old reckless behaviors or confusion, it will be easier for you to trust your instincts and to feel secure ground beneath your feet." And that "Underneath your knowing you can also feel things." Yes, I could apply meaning to these statements, but they didn't feel especially relevant to me personally.

In that amazing first reading, the woman not only gave facts; she captured my dad's personality. As the reading was coming to a close, she suddenly looked surprised and laughed. She explained she'd asked my dad if he wanted to tell me he loved me, and he replied, "Eh, she knows what I think of her." She had never had a deceased loved one reply like that before. That was 110% my dad! In fact, many times when I would tell him I loved him and he wouldn't say it back, I would get angry. He would laugh and say. "Oh come on! You know what I think of you." 

In a particularly bad reading, the medium, along with telling me my dad loved me (a fairly safe guess), stated he was around me, he knows I miss him, he knows I'm sad. Obviously, those are either unverifiable or could apply to almost anyone. If she had said those things along with accurate information, that would have been fine. But she did not. 

The best mediums fill their readings with factual details. One described the brown wooden dresser in my parents' room with a missing gold handle. A few mentioned my dad's work and hobbies. My grandfather's work. Names. The number of kids in the family...verifiable facts. 

When it became clear to one medium that I was not responding to the general and cliché "life wisdom" my dad was apparently sharing with me, she tried to intimidate and shame me. In a condescending tone, she stated my dad was telling her I needed to learn to trust. She continued that I am so overly left-brained, clearly to a fault. She also let me know that with these kinds of abilities, if you try to get proof, only false information will come in. She stated she was also a healer and helping me work past my need for proof. Even in my deep grief, I had to chuckle at the pure absurdity.

One affordable medium once let me know that I had a curse on me preventing me from thriving. She could remove it with magical candles that happened to cost $300. If a medium ever tries to say you have a curse they can cure or upsells at all...run. 

However, there are endorsements that carry weight. The Windbridge Institute and Forever Family Foundation put all mediums they certify through testing to help assure they are genuine and highly accurate. And if you find out a medium participated in research at The University of Virginia–DOPS, they are most likely excellent. 

Even if you end up being really disappointed by a reading, don't lose hope. As the skeptical William James said about the medium Leonora Piper, whom he studied: "If you wish to upset the law that all crows are black, you mustn't seek to show that no crows are; it is enough if you prove one single crow to be white.”