5 Ways To Heal Your Inner Child & Stand In Your Power As An Adult

The inner child represents your gut feelings, from the most painful and challenging to the happiest, most creative, and most joyful.

That time you asked your co-worker if there was room for you in the book club and she contorted her face and said she'd, "get back to you"? That gut punch you felt was coming from a wounded part of your inner child. The feeling of glee you get jumping on a trampoline? That's a free, happy part of your inner child.

When we only allow in the "good" feelings, we are giving ourselves the message that the whole range of the human experience is not OK. And we are effectively telling our inner child that they are only valid if they want to jump out of bed in the morning singing.

It may seem hard to believe, but the part of you that reminds you about that test you failed in eighth grade or how Sally from accounting is smarter than you, is actually trying to help.

Your inner critic might be mimicking a caretaker you had growing up with the intention of preparing you for the criticism that caught you off-guard back then. Or it might be that part of your inner child is terrified of making mistakes, so they're hard on you in an effort to make you "perfect."

As you can tell from the previous suggestions, the loving inner adult plays a vital role in healing your inner child's fears and pain and therefore is a big piece of your sense of empowerment.

The louder the inner adult is, the more powerful you feel. Power in this case may not look like the patriarchal definition that you are used to. It can look like telling your boss why you deserve a raise, refusing to help your brother move again, and finally ditching your ex.

One way to access your inner loving adult is to get familiar with an attitude of curiosity toward yourself. You know that feeling when you meet someone new and you want to know everything about them? Try putting your hand on your heart and directing that same energy toward your inner child when they're feeling hurt. Imagine that whatever pain you're feeling (that's your inner child) is outside of you, and get curious about it. What does it need?

At some point, we all tell ourselves we're going to do one thing and then do the opposite. Maybe instead of running you binge-watched The Bachelorette, or instead of working on that creative project you doom-scrolled on your phone. Notice how part of you wants to achieve the goal and another part of you would rather peace out and not do it? Your inner child likely has many reasons why they aren't on board, and they need self-compassion to get them talking.

There's a reason the quote, "Dance like no one's watching" strikes a chord with so many people. That freedom you feel when you're lost in a joyful activity is your happy inner child running free. And that feeling is powerful! When was the last time you jumped on a trampoline, or skipped down the street, or sang at the top of your lungs? Granted, people would look at you funny if you skipped down a city street, but you deserve to have that energy in your life, and you shouldn't have to abandon it just because you happened to grow up!