Why You Need To Release Your Emotions — For The Sake Of Your Health 

How many times have you heard this advice about dealing with painful emotions? "Stop being so sensitive. Suck it up and move on."

When others tell you to bury your feelings, it makes you question yourself and the messages your body is trying to send to you. Think about how many times today you've attempted to push away a painful feeling by scrolling through social media, bingeing on Netflix, or using food, alcohol, or addictive substances to avoid emotions. In a world filled with distractions and with the invalidating messages we've received throughout our lives about emotions, it's easy to see why so many people are afraid of feeling.

We've learned how to push discomfort away, but even when we do, it always stays—and grows. A study from the University of Texas found that when we avoid our emotions, we're actually making them stronger. This can create many maladies in the body and in the mind, causing a myriad of health issues.

When you suppress your emotions, you are confusing and hurting your body in a profound way. Emotions are our body's way of getting us to take action. On a very primal level, our bodies are trying to keep us safe at all times. Back in the cave man and cave woman days, we learned to listen to our guts because they would save us from attack: run away or get eaten. People today are not necessarily running from wild animals anymore but reacting to an emotion and processing it can still ultimately protect them from dangers, both physical and mental. With the speed of our days, it can be challenging to hear what our bodies are trying to say, but when we ignore those messages, we can still suffer greatly.

Research suggests that suppressing emotions is associated with high rates of heart disease1, as well as autoimmune disorders, ulcers, IBS, and gastrointestinal health complications. Whether you are experiencing anger, sadness, grief, or frustration, pushing those feelings aside actually leads to physical stress on your body. Studies show that holding in feelings has a correlation to high cortisol—the hormone released in response to stress—and that cortisol leads to lower immunity and toxic thinking patterns. Over time, untreated or unrecognized stress can lead to an increased risk of diabetes, problems with memory, aggression, anxiety, and depression.

In other words, deciding to bury your feelings, ignore them, internalize them, pretend they didn't happen, or convince yourself that there is no need to deal with them can literally make you sick from the stress.

And for a cherry on top: People who regularly refuse to deal with their emotions honestly and fully are also likely to have more interpersonal challenges. They are less aware of the signals they are sending to others and are often more reactive and disconnected from themselves, which can lead to feelings of isolation and can interfere with relationships.

Take a moment to become aware of how your body is feeling during the day. I try to set an alarm or reminder for the morning and midafternoon just to remind myself to check in and take a few deep breaths. No matter what you are doing, take a few moments. Are you tense? If so, where? Are you breathing in a deep way or in a shallow way? How does it feel to take a few deep breaths?

We as humans all have emotions. Some of them are positive; other ones, not so much. Practice self-compassion; try not to invalidate yourself with dismissive or unhealthy self-talk about what you are feeling. If you're upset about the way someone talked to you, it's healthy to feel frustration or sadness; it's not an opportunity to turn this into an unwarranted criticism of yourself. This just makes your cortisol levels skyrocket, leading to more stress and more anxiety and more negative thinking.

When we learn to tune into our bodies, our thoughts actually slow down and offer us more control. Our brains are quite amazing—studies show that a meditation practice improves reactions to stress and can actually change our reactions to emotions, improving our emotional and physical health.

I find that short, guided meditations (two to five minutes) are a great way to get one's mind off of autopilot and reduce avoidance of emotion. I also find it helpful to do this with a teacher and through apps such as Simple Habit and Calm. You can also learn from an expert (like Light Watkins, for example), which helps you stay engaged and accountable to a daily practice.

Doing this daily (ideally in the morning but whatever works for you) can help you become more self-aware.