Romanticizing other people's relationships is not a new concept (thanks, rom-coms). Unlike a movie script, though, social media shows real couples living real lives.

Social media, if used sparingly, is not necessarily bad for relationships.

Research has shown social media use can both positively and negatively affect relationships, depending on how it's used.

For example, social media can contribute to unhealthy comparison and unrealistic expectations for what relationships are supposed to be like, and couples may spend more time curating an "image" of who they are rather than focusing on the relationship itself. 

Although there are some useful resources shared via social media, "what you will mostly see are curated and filtered posts that only highlight unrealistic images of what a relationship is," says sex and behavioral therapist Chamin Ajjan, M.S., LCSW, A-CBT.

Attempting to measure up can distract you and your partner from the relationship.

Inevitably, real life won't look like the endless highlight reels we see on social media, which can lead to disappointment in either yourself, your partner, or both.

Some research has linked social media use with increased jealousy1 and relationship dissatisfaction in college students.

If you are prone to jealousy because of an insecure attachment style, research says you may be more likely to get stuck in a cycle of endless scrolling to keep an eye on your partner's activities.

People may get upset seeing their partner liking or commenting on other people's posts, stoking concerns that their partner is interested in other people (or worse, is already cheating).

The use of Facebook, in particular, has been shown to increase feelings of suspicion and jealousy in romantic relationships among college students.

"This effect may be the result of a feedback loop, whereby using Facebook exposes people to often ambiguous information about their partner that they may not otherwise have access to," one study writes.

For example, cookies and Facebook algorithms can cause a partner's "hidden" interests to pop up on their feed.

The desire to find more information about them can perpetuate further social media use and feelings of mistrust.

A 2013 study found that, among couples who had been together for less than three years, spending more time on Facebook was linked with more "Facebook-related conflict"2 and more negative relationship outcomes.

The drool-worthy image of a couple on vacation can trigger feelings of envy, which can keep you from appreciating where you are in the present moment. 

"Social media tends to ignore the gritty and mundane parts of a couple's lives," says Ken Page, LCSW, psychotherapist and host of The Deeper Dating Podcast.

Struggles, chores, compromise, and intimacy in the midst of challenges—these small mini triumphs are valuable, he says.

Just remember: A vacation can make you feel happy, but it's the everyday moments that lead to ultimate satisfaction.

Though internet addiction4 and Facebook addiction5 are not considered mental health disorders by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V), researchers recognize both as dependence issues, which can interfere with quality of life.

The more we become hooked on the dopamine rush of social media, Page says, the less engaged or excited we will feel for the quieter, simpler moments of life.

"But those are often the moments when our loved one reveals something personal and intimate," he explains.

Next time you and your partner are together and both focused on your phones, bring awareness to that.

Even though social media is meant to promote connection, multiple studies have linked social media use with loneliness6, mood disorders, and poor self-esteem7.

People with preexisting mental health issues may also be more susceptible to social comparisons, due to a negative cognitive bias8, one study found.

On the flip side, lowering social media use has been shown to reduce loneliness and depression symptoms.

Though these issues are more individualistic than relational, they can bleed into romantic relationships.

The filtered and edited images you see all over social media can cause insecurities about your own body to surface, Ajjan says.

Several studies have linked social media use and body image issues9.

A person's body image issues can significantly affect their relationships.

One Journal of the International Society for Sexual Medicine study shows that heterosexual women with body image issues10 have a harder time becoming sexually aroused. 

Another study found the way wives perceive their own sexual attractiveness11, based on negative body image, directly affects the marital quality of both the wife and the husband.  

Excessive social media use is linked to narcissistic traits12 in some cases.

Research confirms that addictive social media use reflects a need to feed the ego and an attempt to improve self-esteem, both of which are narcissistic traits.

And different types of social media play into different aspects of narcissism.

For example, people who frequently tweet or post selfies may be displaying grandiosity, one of the common traits of narcissism.

Since you can be narcissistic without having a personality disorder, it's possible to develop these traits over time—and at least one small study has found excess social media use may be a trigger.  

In the digital age we live in, it's not uncommon for people to meet online or through dating apps—in fact, it may be more common.

A 2017 survey found 39% of heterosexual couples reported meeting their partner online, compared to just 22% in 2009.

A later study analyzing the results found that "Internet meeting is displacing the roles that family and friends once played in bringing couples together."

According to one survey, online dating can be especially helpful for the LGBTQ+ community.

Whether it's sending a funny meme over Instagram or taking a quick Snapchat, social media is an easy way for couples to interact throughout the day in a fun, low-pressure manner.

This is particularly helpful for couples who don't live together and people in long-distance relationships. According to a survey published in the Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking journal, young adults in long-distance romantic relationships13 are better able to maintain them if they're using social networking sites.

"There are plenty of accounts that offer up good information to help develop and maintain a healthy connection," Ajjan says. "There is a lot of good information on social media from relationship bloggers, psychotherapists, and many others that highlight how to improve your relationship."

Social media platforms have practically replaced printed photograph albums as a place to store and share our memories.

In this sense, Page says social media can be used to honor the activities you do and the things you create together. 

Unlike a physical photo album, social media has the added component of followers.

Scrolling through social media all day is, unfortunately, not a hard habit to pick up.

While these platforms can offer helpful resources, they can also lead to jealousy, mental health issues, and unrealistic expectations in relationships.

On top of that, the act of being on your phone constantly can distract from intimacy with a partner.