30 Ways To Actually Empower Women

In honor of International Women's Day, we spoke to our community of wellness experts, as well as the influential thinkers, educators, and activists leading the movement for greater equality and justice, to understand how women can better support each other on a daily basis in every single part of their lives. That includes everything from work to motherhood to emotional well-being and beyond.

Women's narratives are vastly underrepresented in the media and popular culture. So when you see a woman taking it upon herself to share her story and let herself be vulnerable, acknowledge that act of bravery. Jolene Brighten, functional naturopathic medical doctor and mbg Collective member, specifically points to social media as a place to enact validation: "If you see a woman brave enough to make herself vulnerable and share her personal story on social media, let her know you see her and you honor her truth," she tells mbg. "If you see another person putting down her personal experience or bullying her, step in and gently remind them that this is her truth and you applaud her for speaking it."

Women already get a lot of commentary about the way they look. If you're looking to compliment a woman, Brighten suggests describing her insides rather than her outsides. "Try to compliment a woman on something other than her looks once daily," she says. "We all like to be told we're beautiful, and we also love to hear we are brilliant, kind, dedicated, strong, etc. Pay forward the unexpected compliments."

Identifying as a woman does not preclude you from bias or automatically mean you're free from responsibility when it comes to oppressing others. "Recognize the unconscious biases you might have against other women based on their race, age, sexual orientation, gender expression, physical abilities, body type, and socioeconomic background," Liana Naima, wellness writer and multidisciplinary energy healer, tells mbg. "Check your own unconscious biases and uplift the voices of women of color in your field who are facing additional biases in the workplace. Unconscious biases oftentimes lead to systemic discrimination. Addressing this issue starts with checking your own beliefs and encouraging the discussion of biases in your workplace when you notice a lack of inclusivity and diversity."

Black women are especially placed with the burden of being too "strong" to experience pain—despite being more at risk of mental illnesses like depression, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Don't make assumptions about which one of your woman friends most needs help and support, Naima says. "Gift all of your friends check-in time to see how they are caring for their mental and emotional health. 'How are you?' can come off as a superficial question, but asking 'How is your mental and emotional health?' cuts through superficiality."

"We tend to forget about the importance of unplugging and separating ourselves from others to reflect on what's happening in our lives," she says. "Alone time is not only great for your overall well-being, but it can also increase the quality of the relationships you have with other women. Schedule alone time on your calendar so you have the opportunity to reinvigorate your mind and body. Encourage other women to schedule alone time and to not be afraid to eat lunch alone when they are at work and need to decompress."

"We have got to know who the other women are out there doing good shit in areas that intersect with our own work," she tells mbg. "Always, always, always have a list of names at the ready to recommend and signal-boost."

"Sometimes empowering yourself means stepping back and allowing someone else into the spotlight," Jawed-Wassel adds. "I never agree to an opportunity without first thinking, 'Is there another woman (particularly a WOC) who knows more about this issue than me?'"

Heading up a search committee for new hires in your department? Go out of your way to extend support for the women candidates being considered, Jawed-Wessel says. "If we make an offer for a position to a woman, before she makes a decision, I make a point to tell her what myself and others successfully negotiated for in terms of salary and benefits. A better package for her harms me in no way at all and sets the bar for her to do the same for women who come after her."

Likewise, always acknowledge that not all women menstruate, and not all people who menstruate are women. Avoid gendered language when talking about menstrual cycles and vulvas unless you're specifically talking about women who have them.

Women who own business are constantly shortchanged. Research shows male entrepreneurs are twice as likely to raise $100,000 or more as their female counterparts. So go out of your way to support businesses that are owned and/or run by women, behavioral scientist and personal development coach Dinorah Nieves, Ph.D., tells mbg. "Many female entrepreneurs lack adequate support in the form of funding or sweat equity," she says. "Invest your time and/or money in competent, capable women who are making an impact."

"We won't all always agree with one another just because we share a gender identifier," Nieves says. "As women, however, we often do share the experience of having been dismissed and left feeling unheard and like our point of view was unimportant. So let's not do it to one another. If a woman makes a legitimate point (even if it represents an opposing view), honor her intelligence and courage before voicing your contrasting opinion. 'I hear you, and that makes sense. And I know it's not necessarily easy to have these conversations. My perspective is…'"

"When you hear your friend start to give an explanation of her actions, after listening for a few minutes, gently remind her that 'just because you want to' is a sufficient reason," Hallett says. "She has permission to make the choices she wants, without justification. The idea of actively giving yourself permission is very empowering and reinforces your ability to act in your own best interests, treating yourself with love and compassion."

Men do 75 percent of the talking at business meetings, research shows. With this in mind, Hallett suggests actively asking women colleagues for feedback during meetings. "For maximum effectiveness, approach your colleague before the meeting and tell her you'd love to hear her thoughts/opinions on a specific topic as you feel it would be of benefit to the group," Hallett says. "This way, she is prepared for the ask, and you are also demonstrating her value to the group as a whole."

Publicly thank women for brewing the coffee, tidying up the PowerPoint, or scheduling the kids' medical appointments. Or better yet—do it yourself so she doesn't have to.

One way to even out the playing field when it comes to sex is to simply talk more about it, Shula Melamed, M.A., MPH, relationship and well-being coach, tells mbg. "Create nonjudgmental spaces to talk about sexuality and desire," she recommends. "A lot of the time in my work I find that the main question I get is 'Am I normal?' So whether it's fantasies they want to explore, physiological or hormonal changes that affect performance or responses, or shifting relationship dynamics, talking about these things can help women release shame and find out that a lot of other people experience similar things."

"Women have been socialized to wave away compliments about their abilities, their accomplishments, their self-representation—the list goes on and on," Melamed adds. "Encourage each other to simply say 'thank you' when someone genuinely acknowledges your hard work, achievements, or fabulous style. Owning these things first of all within oneself and through the acknowledgment of others allows one to be seen and to see themselves in a powerful way. Batting off compliments are somehow seen as a part of being well-mannered, but we should help each other recognize our greatness!"

"Be a role model for young girls, paying close attention to statements about gender behavior ('That's a girl toy,’ 'That's a boy activity,' etc.)," she tells mbg. "If you notice these phrases around them, acknowledge it and say something different. Always encourage girls to be bold and brave, from their very earliest moments."

"Say you are feminist, even if it's uncomfortable. A feminist is just someone who believes in equal rights for all," Wegner says.

It's important for all women—just like anyone else—to make sure they're constantly stopping to examine their own privilege, says Rachel Ricketts, racial justice advocate, lawyer, and healer. "An empowering question to ask, particularly when we find ourselves or others feeling defensive in discussions regarding oppression, is: Whose comfort is most being prioritized right now? If it isn't that of the most marginalized womxn, it's time to stop, reassess, and start again," she says. "This is of critical importance because it can be all too easy to center ourselves and our own comfort during challenging conversations, intentionally or otherwise, but creating equality and liberation for all womxn demands that we operate from spaces that best prioritize and protect the most disenfranchised among us."

Mentoring women is a key way to tackle gender inequality in the workplace, but psychotherapist and executive coach Perpetua Neo, DClinPsy, suggests taking mentorship a step further: "Women are 'over-mentored' but 'under-sponsored,' meaning a specific form of mentoring angled at getting someone promoted, by someone with power and influence to do so," she says. "So one of the biggest favors you can do for a fellow female is that in an organization, when you spot someone you'd typically mentor, you could sponsor them or educate them on this option."

"Stop competing with each other in the 'race to the bottom,'" Neo adds. "There are groups who get off on who is doing more and/or suffering more. There is overt shaming ('Used an epidural? Had a C-section? You bad mother!' or 'Not a stay-at-home mom? You are hurting your child's development!') without understanding the individual's circumstances and choices. Sometimes it can help us feel vindicated by thinking we're doing the 'right thing,' but shaming others makes everything worse. Dimming someone else's light does not make yours shine brighter."

"Wink and smile at a momma whose kid is having a meltdown in public. Including on a long plane flight," says Aviva Romm, M.D., integrative medicine doctor, herbalist, midwife, and mbg Collective member. "It's usually more painful for her than it is for you—and having your support and encouragement can give her the lift and confidence she needs to get through those rough moments."

Most women have it rough, and when you consider intersectional identities, there's almost always some subsection of women who probably have it worse. "Embrace all women's suffering as your own," Dr. Romm says. "It's not that you have to suffer, but if there is inequality for women anywhere, it affects all of us. Pick a movement to support or get involved in—whether it's distributing period products, volunteering at a shelter or on a hotline, or running for office!"

"Tell the women in your life you love and care for them," Bindiya Gandhi, M.D., American Board Family Medicine–certified physician and mbg Collective member, tells mbg. "Often they forget, and often you don't feel appreciated. When you show your appreciation to those around you, they will reciprocate their feelings."

"When I see a woman who is beautiful to me, I always tell her she's beautiful," life coach Shazia Imam tells mbg. "I used to feel shy to say it, especially to strangers and worrying they would think I'm weird! But I decided to let my own self-doubts go and say it—whether it's at a social event, at the cash register, or even on the street! And every single time, the woman smiles back to say 'thank you' with a huge smile on her face. Often with the words, 'You made my day!'"

"Early in my career, I sent a simple email to the VP of our 25,000-plus company to say thank you for an employee satisfaction survey she sent firmwide. I also offered to support initiatives moving forward for women, because I genuinely cared," Imam says. "She responded back within minutes and had me create and head up the Women's Forum at the company! This small act (that I believed wouldn't even be noticed) was the gateway to creating networking opportunities, fun activities, and leadership meet-and-greets for the female employees. It was pivotal in many of the women's careers, including mine. ... Don't underestimate the power of your voice and the doors that will open if you put it out there!"

"I have experienced firsthand the struggles of putting myself out there, cultivating confidence, and making the sale," functional and integrative dietitian and nutritionist Nour Zibdeh, M.S., RDN, CLT, tells mbg. "When a friend wrote a book, I bought it. When another started a podcast, I shared it on my social media feed and continue to do that. I was just recently at a fundraiser event and bought a silent auction item from someone who offered a personal yoga session. I definitely wanted the yoga session, but a part of me really wanted to support her and her business. When I find a woman doing something great, I make sure I share her message online and offline."

"When it comes to actually slowing down and taking the necessary time we need out for self-care, we sometimes need reinforcements to make sure we actually slow down and do so," Lalah Delia tells mbg. "Being a reinforcer for one another in this way could look like helping to create the space and container for self-care time to actualize. Such as: covering the workload or chores for a sister friend, picking up her children and giving her time off, helping to extract her from her rigid routine and life for a while, running her a spa-style bath at her place or yours, scheduling her a massage or other spa treatment, making her a nourishing herbal tonic to slow down and gather herself, and just basically helping her to take a pause from her life, and not allowing her to resume until she is refueled, re-nourished, and feeling like herself again. This is a great way to be in service, as vessels, to the ones we love."

"In public spaces, we can empower and affirm one another by showing up and letting our collective and united presence be made known," Delia says. "This could look like showing up at an event in support, leaving supportive comments on online posts and online works, arriving at a meeting together, sitting side by side at an event or meeting, and also in terms of safety, by walking to our vehicles, to the bus, or train together."

Last but not least, make sure you're giving back to the women who give to you, Delia says. "Sending positive messages to one another is a great way to empower, encourage, and sustain one another. It's important that this is reciprocal so that all involved are benefiting and doing their part to nourish the friendship. Don't let the other women you care about carry the friendship all alone. Show up, pitch in, and mean it. That's empowering."