Want a Joyful, Fulfilling Life? Do This

Finding the things that challenge you, that bring you joy, and that make life feel truly worthwhile starts with reflection. But what are you supposed to reflect on? How do you find the data to answer those big questions? This new book, Designing Your Life, was written to help you do just that.

"Wayfinding" is the ancient art of figuring out where you're going when you don't know your destination. Traditional wayfinding (out in the wilderness, for example) requires a compass and a direction. When it comes to wayfinding in life, there's no one destination. So, you can't just put your goal into your GPS and have it spit out the perfect directions.

What you can do is pay attention to the clues in front of you, and make your way forward with the tools you have at hand. The first clues for finding your direction are engagement and energy.

Flow is that state of being in which time stands still, you're totally engaged in an activity, and the challenge of that particular activity matches your skill—you're neither bored (because it's too easy) nor anxious (because it's too hard). People describe this state of engagement as "euphoric." Flow is play for grown-ups.

After engagement, the second wayfinding clue to look for is energy. We engage in physical and mental activities all day long. Some activities sustain our energy and some drain it; we want to track those fluctuations.

To help you figure out where your energy is going every week, create a Good Time Journal. How you build yours is up to you—use a favorite notebook or planner, write in the pages of Designing Your Life, grab a stack of blank paper. The most important thing is that you actually do it—regularly.

There are two elements to your journal: an activity log (where you record when you're engaged and energized. You can download a blank copy of the activity log here) and reflections (where you discover what you're learning).

The second element of the Good Time Journal is reflection—looking over your activity log and noticing trends, insights, surprises—anything that is a clue to what does and doesn't work for you. Do the activity log for at least three weeks, or whatever period of time you need to be sure you capture all the various kinds of activities that arise in your current situation. Write your weekly reflections on blank pages in your journal.

When you are reflecting in your journal, follow the joy—follow what engages and excites you, what brings you alive. Work is fun when you are leaning into your strengths, when you are deeply engaged and energized by what you're doing.