9 Red Flags That Show They're Not Ready For You & What To Do 

Some of these signs might appear obvious, but many very intelligent people miss them. If you’re ready to create a long-term relationship or find yourself stuck in one that's not progressing the way you want it to, these nine warning signs can help you make a better prediction about your future with the other person. And hopefully save you a ton of valuable time in the process.

An example of this is that person who makes you feel so wanted, alive and beautiful but can then go days (or even weeks) without even texting you. This game of “hot and cold” feels exciting at times but will never make you happy long term.

So while a person doesn’t need to have already landed their dream job or started a business in order to offer you commitment, they do need to be hungry enough to do something to get there. Without growth, it’s unlikely they can offer you much depth of strength or groundedness.

Be wary of a person who doesn’t demonstrate a willingness to face challenges with you and either constantly runs away or pretends the problem isn’t happening. Having “a talk” with a partner is always nerve-wracking, but those who do so with courage express a priceless attitude that’s essential to make a relationship last.

There are plenty of ways to predict future behavior and integrity is one of the most critical ones.

You can tell a lot about how committed a person is by their capacity to envision and get excited about a future with you. If they are not taking into account your needs and desires future plans, this shows that they're either not taking the steps to move into a longer-term relationship or that their fear of losing freedom today is more powerful than their desire to commit.

If their default attitude when you express your concerns or bring up a problem is getting defensive or acting hurt, it’s just a matter of time before you shut down and resent them in a major way. As long as you’re bringing up issues in a non-critical way, they should have the capacity and curiosity to show interest and listen to you.All people can get defensive at times but when someone is mostly defensive this demonstrates a level of insecurity and close-mindedness that can easily destroy the relationship.

It’s never about choosing you versus them; it’s about showing you that you are their priority now.

Almost all of us do this at some level: We tend to judge others harsher for things that we might let slide in ourselves. The challenge arises when they have a nearly impossible standard for you to meet, in terms of showing up happy, speaking kindly, arriving on time—when they aren't willing to go there first.

Obviously you don’t want a person who won't budge or compromise, but you most definitely don’t want someone who consistently says yes when they're compromising on something that’s of vital importance to them.

No person is perfect and even awesome partners display a couple of these from time to time. If your partner is displaying a few of these, have a talk. Openly share your standards and expectations with them. Most importantly: be radically honest with yourself, don’t make up excuses to justify behaviors you don't agree with.